Unfinished

For the past few months I have been really into re-finishing and painting furniture. I love the french farmhouse chic formally known as shabby chic house decor, but I have a limited budget for any decorating or re-decorating. Like my stepmom used to tell me, I have champagne taste on a beer budget, and boy that couldn’t be anymore true! For the most part my house follows my farmhouse theme to a T, but I wanted to make my furniture and cabinets in my house a little more “me”. So I decided to take up painting.

It all started with these bar stools that were left behind by the previous owners of our house, I loved the style and they fit our bar height perfectly but most importantly they were FREE. Two of my favorite words are free and cheap although I’m told, I should say thrifty or frugal instead, but alas old habits die-hard. I re-painted those stools and distressed them and from then on I have had the itch. I have gone from bar stools, to the vanity and mirror in our master bathroom, then our laundry room cabinets to our entertainment center, the head-board in Scarlett’s room and my latest project is this cute little miniature antique roll-top desk for Scarlett. I have found that I really love to paint and re-finish furniture it gives me a sense of accomplishment knowing I have a brand new custom piece of furniture and that I was able to do it myself and for peanuts really. I have also found the process to be quite stress relieving as well. What is stress relieving for me though kind of drives Abe crazy, well not all of it just the unfinished cabinets in our laundry room.

When I took on the job of re-painting our laundry room cabinets I had two different shades of gray and couldn’t decide which color I liked best so I decided to paint one cabinet one shade and the other the second shade. After I painted the cabinets I decided what shade I liked best. I painted all three cabinets and left the fourth kind of unfinished. It is painted but just a different shade than the other three and it drives Abe crazy. He always asks why I’ve started a new project when I haven’t finished that cabinet in the laundry room yet. I’ve always just laughed it off and continued on with my projects. The truth of the matter is though, I like to keep the door the way it is because it serves as a reminder to me, that like that cabinet door, I too am an unfinished work of art. The one big difference between me and that door is, I am an unfinished work of art being “painted” by the master artist, the most masterful artist there ever was or ever will be, Jesus. He is sculpting, painting and re-finishing me into the person he wants me to be. I like to have the reminder because I am often times very hard on myself for my struggles and downfalls. But when I look at myself as an unfinished custom piece of art I am a lot less tough on myself.

I do have some anxiety, specifically around traveling, I am terrified of flying and long car rides. I am always afraid it is going to be horrible or something will go terribly wrong. I am trying to over come that anxiety and sometimes it gets the better of me but I just pray and continue to look at myself through the eyes of my heavenly Father and see how he looks at me as an unfinished work of art. He is continuing to sand and chip away at the old layers of  me and make me into the Godly woman he wants me to become. I know that anxiety stems from fear and fear comes from satan telling me that the Lord isn’t capable of protecting me and keeping me calm and giving me peace. Sometimes I get so frustrated with myself for letting my anxiety keep me from realizing that Jesus will protect me and he will give me peace and he is ultimately in control of it all. If I just truly trust with not just my words and my head but with my heart and truly trust he will be able to take away every fear and anxious feeling.

I, as a person have so many layers of my old self that still need to be chipped away and sanded down, and covered by the love of Christ. The day I accepted Jesus as my personal Lord and Savior is the day I said, “Here Lord, here it is, all of me and I am trusting you to take control and do with it what you may. I want you to plan my life and give me direction, peace and guidance on all my future endeavors because Lord, I cannot do this life without you.” Saying those words and putting them into practice is where the difficulty lies, for me anyway. These days I am trying to put those words into action and continue to let the Lord chip away and sand me down to the christian wife and mother he would have me to be. Next time you cannot see anything good in yourself, remember that you are a beautiful, unique but unfinished work of art created by the master artist and he is not finished with you yet.

 _______________________

 Ephesians 6:11-12

Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. 

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